I do love the song ‘never enough’ from the greatest showman except I also don’t like it as it’s a programming tool that keeps us in the loop for the ‘never enough’ syndrome that is RIFE in a scarcity oriented culture we are up against on a daily basis!
I LOVE Brene Brown’s work in this area she expresses it well…
“We live in a culture of never enough: Never good enough, skinny enough, popular enough, never enough Twitter followers,…
And there’s only one way out of scarcity and that is enoughness. At some point, we just need to say “enough”: I am enough. What I‘m doing is enough.
It’s about waking up in the morning and saying:
No matter what gets done and how much is done and how it’s done, I’m enough and I’m worthy of belonging and love and joy.”
AND TIME..
“There’s always enough time to do what I want and need to do” Gay Hendricks, the Big Leap
It’s interesting how we have weaponised our lives in such a way that we can feel controlled and beaten up by something that is a technological constraint outside of us and where the fear and loathing of ‘not enough’ mostly comes from our own internal narrative and pressure to take on more, say yes to everything and then blame ‘time’ when we cant get it done?
It wasn’t time.
It was us.
Perhaps driven by scarcity or this feeling that we aren’t quite enough and if we did that one more thing we would prove our worthiness… to who?
Lately I have found myself in a pothole of pressure .. it feels like that part in the symphony where the music gets louder and faster and deeper and your heart races and you feel agitated and you want to burst or run out the door, you aren’t sure which because it is so INTOXICATING…. The reality is we are addicted to the chemicals that our body produces in this not enough state.. The ones that keep us adding more to the pile, saying yes and regretting it later, convincing ourselves we can take it on and that it will be okay.
And it is.
Until it isn’t.
Because of this pothole I found myself in an overwhelm loop (a symptom of the pothole!) recently and staring at my lists that keep being added to with SO much amazingness and I realised that this WAS the crescendo of the BREAKTHROUGH moment!
When we want for things to change, we’ll be given all the ways that it shouldn’t and given evidence to prove our current state correct and, if we want to honour our deep desires we MUST keep moving through these states and find NEW STORIES to tell ourselves.
I realised…
I put all this pressure on myself
Decisions I made led me to here
I had to see I was using the weapons of choice of scarcity that Brene Brown specifies:
- Shame
- Comparison
- Disengagement
And stop it.
And realise that IF I had to put everything down because of some emergency I could and it would all be okay (none of it’s life and death, though it feels like it sometimes)
And so I realised I had
CHOICE
Because the truth is
I am enough (and so are you)
And there is ALWAYS enough time to do what we want and need to do.
Putting too much on our plate doesn’t make us bad or stupid or unworth or any of the loops we share in our minds, it just means at some point in time we made a few decisions that have led us to now… and we STILL HAVE CHOICE to change it!
The minute I realised that.. And gave myself permission to put everything down.. .AND that I was enough and there was always enough.. I was able to focus and get jobs done, crossing them off the list.
And next time I have a bright idea or get a great offer I might future pace it a little so my future self thanks me for the things I don’t do as much as the things I do!
This is legacy living.
Because our legacy is not just what we leave behind, it’s how we go about leaving it for ourselves and others 🙂
If you find yourself in the never enough loop and would like support please make the most of my free energy reading and healings on my youtube channel, book in a personalised energy reading and healing or join me for fortnightly session and an incredibly supportive group of women who are all agents for change in whyldwomen.com OR reach out hello@rebelblack.com to explore in what other ways I can support you! You can read also more about other work I do at www.therwcollection.com
